Don’t break down, we at Scorch got the budget breakdown for all you mofos that were busy recovering from Red October or studying how to get tuh Miami Carnival than really listening to what Mr. Minister Finance, Colin Imbert, had to say. Last night lines to gas stations extended longer than yuh girl’s weave. Why? Cause Charlotte boulevard weave not good. No. Back to the point. Motorists were waiting to get their fill of $1.50 diesel and $1.72 Super. Today they both increased by 15%. The slight increase in gas is just the surface of the reform presented in the 2 hour budget presentation last night.

Some Key Points

On-the-Job (OJT) trainees to get a 20 per cent increase in stipends effective January 2016. Bout f%cking time. Years now D youths them scruntin. lol.

They plan to remove all D traffic lights from Town tuh Grande, and constructing roundabouts and other infrastructure in POS and Chaguanas.

Skylackers beware! In coming years not everyone going to receive GATE jusso jusso.

Imbert: We will reintroduce the rent to own home ownership plan. Hmmm.

A National Health Insurance system will be in place soon. How soon is soon tho? Trini soon? Or Oxford dictionary soon?

A free national public wireless network beginning with free wifi hotspots. Eyyy! We GT boi! Free Wifi Dawg!!!

By 2021, at least 10 per cent of energy must be from renewable sources.

“Free drivers’ permits and free passports to retirees over the age of 60. Granny yuh GT!

“Personal allowance increased from 60,000 annually to 72,000. Value Added Tax (VAT) reduced from 15 per cent to 12.5 per cent.” And yadda yadda yadda.

Good stuff. Good stuff.

Mr. Imbert also explained that the previous government had maxed out our overdraft. And We were running on fumes. Whether these fumes were ganja fumes, he did not specify.

Closing off, Mr. Imbert said, “I could have easily resorted to bacchanal. But the time for that is long gone. The majority of the population is exhausted by the political mamaguy.” Hmmm